A Clean Pair of Eyes

I am not sure how many moments I have left.
For I have counted the minutes
as if they are days
long and daunting.
I keep slipping back into oblivion
with you.

I am falling quickly down that mudslide
behind your house
and I am unable to catch myself on anything
but the necklace that used to hold a promise
of an easy exit to anywhere
with you.

It chokes me with no comparison
to tomorrow's desperation
and yesterday's forfeited love
that was given to the Man in the easy chair
(who is comfortable smoking a pack a day and not worrying about a thing),
and forgetting a promise he made
to you.

I gambled and lost a thousand memories
when I agreed to leave you,
and as I left
I tripped over my insecurites
and fell flat into the mouth of hatred
dangling over death's door
with you.