Flop

i didn't spend a lot of time on this
but like all things, I dreamed it first.
there was a progression, and I must tell you
at first it was empty.
remember that feeling in our stomachs? you do.
that day. that fucking empty day we decided not to decide.
it was like that, only a grillion times worse.
I'd like to blame it on the leaves or the trees or the music
blaring in the background.
that's what I'd like.
but that isn't how it really played out.
it played out hard and cold. just as you meant it to.

i can't believe it was you.
and now it's just me
without that laugh of yours in my ears
or the sound of your voice when you say my name
like no other.
or even, your sadness.
I'm without all of those things, now.
and my tears are no longer justified, for it's been too long since you
slammed your hand in my face and said:
FUCK YOU