my complex Lexx

you don't even
have to tell me about it,
about \"her\".

but know my patience
is running thin,
riding the sweaty train
home from coffee land.
talking about nothing
really, nothing at all.

wondering whether
it would be weird
to ask you
to hold me
long and
hard
in this
breathless
rush hour
right
now.

before i get the chance to,
you reach for that warm water bottle,
and happy zip-lock bag full
of extra-strength
tylenol.

\"looks like I'm
carrying around
something suspicious,\"
you explain to me,
gently,
humorously.

\"It's just that I can't take
my family's whole bottle
of tylenol with my to work.\"

oh whatever, lexxie
don't get all sensible
on me.

\"sure looks like tylenol to me,\"

i shrug,

wondering why your brown eyes
have to light up like they do
making you seem all too
fucking gorgeous
as the train churns out
of BLOOR, on to ROSEDALE

just when
i thought spring
was beginning to revive
you,
me,
(*us?)

you slip again
into the headache:

another cold night,
spinning
dark energy
spent

crying over
___________.