more revealing

in all fairness
I should tell you that
you only captured several
of the many compartments
that comprise my heart
and yes, I DO realize
that holding out the rest
is not likely the best way
to build whatever it is
we are attempting to construct
but at least, I am honest
and you know where your footing is
though, perhaps not completely stable

I'd like very much to give more
of an insight in to the remaining
intricacies that when strung together
create some assemblance
of a greater whole I call myself
the woman; the apparition of experience
blurred by eraser smears as I
try over and over to get it right
marking more than paper with the score
that embeds a little deeper every time
so that even when I've removed
the first so called answer
and moved on to writing the next
there remains in indentation in my soul
further deepening the hole
that I know that no one but me can fill
and still we try

and for the most part, I'm self sufficient
and seek merely a partner to jog alongside
the track with me; it's a race- not by choice
rather forced upon us by the sand grains
steadily falling every day to ensure
we feel the sense of urgency to keep the pace
as not to buckle under their growing weight
and sometimes, I admit; I get really fucking tired
and I can't keep up with you
no matter how much I wish that I could
and I take a time out for myself
and sort out the remaining compartments
to which you don't have access
hoping to clean up some of my mess
before you get in and discover
that perhaps I don't have the tidiest mind

remember that I did not have to admit
the things I have chosen to share
and I hope you won't get too impatient
and take a crowbar to the locks
because right now, I cannot afford
to replace or repair any damage you might cause
I'm tapped for the moment and residing
in rebuild mode; replenishing once again
the depleted mental reservoir's resource
so I can contribute my fair share
to any and all of our endeavors

though you only have a few
of the many parts of me I have to offer
you should know that my intent
is to allocate the remaining shares
to you, as they gain value
and I hope this finds you smiling
and embracing possibilities
because according to my parents
I'm one hell of a catch
though, please feel no pressure to chase me
just run beside me patiently
and decide for yourself if it is right