Believeland is my home

if i were really clever
or had more time i
would more closely
align this with the first
lines that came down
tonight, but they're all
up here live for these
interwebs to see and
please - believe me -
Cleveland is my City.

I was created and
molded on these
streets and now
so many years
later i have
come back
and i just
remembered
i made the stupid
crack about the crazy
polish kid returning to
cleveland forgetting that
he was polish descent
as well and oh well i
probably committed
forty or more other
social faux paus
but i didn't hesi-
tate or pause i
didn't let my
emotions
control
me &
i now
am
beginning
to remember
me as Indiana
seems like a dream
that never really existed
and yet i run a website there
and i told the PD editor today i
didn't want to become Gannett i
want to spread the power to more
and more journalists - a loose
collective of independents
with more competition
there is cooperation
perhaps in the 21st
century and he read
my lofty words on his
BlackBerry as i tried
to consume a sand-
wich - a barbarian at
the gates it must have
seemed at some point
to him, but there was an
acknowledgement, of
sorts, perhaps, that i
have some of the keys
that have eluded them.
i brought up revenue
more than once and
even said their sites
were cookie cutter &
that their ownership
slowed them down
incredibly. i brought
up clevelandpress
.com as well saying
one of us had to go
after the bastard
spammers they
have more re-
sources so
we shall see...

and i looked over the
new newsroom and
it was a quiet hump
day at the paper a
little after noon,
but it felt good
and my other
thoughts left
and there i
was trying
not to fit in
but some-
how show
or explain
what it is
i think i'm
doing ... and
what i think i'm
doing i'm actually
doing ... but back to
Believeland - and a
crazy "journalist"
publisher that
also writes
poetry to
the public
on the sly
in his spare
time and the
lines and the
lines of words
cause quite a
stir in my own
mind but i am
aware they do
strike others
differently.

in the heart,
in the gut, this
city is my city and
always has been - this
Believeland as the young
ones are calling it - visitors
from other realms descending
to say goodbye to Lebron Who?

me and my crew -
building new media
for you - the people -
the popular points
perhaps perpen-
dicular to pos-
sible libel.
stop.

bend.
start
again.

the press room
far away as it is
in all big cities
as the news-
papers consolidate
what they do have ...

did you know the Cleveland Scene
isn't even local anymore? to be honest
i haven't looked too far in their direction yet,
other than to call them the "Leisure Suit Larry"
of Cleveland media. walking to the local cafe with
art i should have shot - i had my new gear - but i
was elsewhere and now where am i? back to
Believeland. i still haven't read the article that
bears that name, but maybe like Titanic the
movie it will take me ten years to do so
for now, though, i take the term and
make it my own - a sure sign of
some sort of power - over
words if nothing else -
and everything else
fades to the back-
ground like a wire-
less signal that
doesn't quite
work well.

small jabs.
like Leon
Bibb said
Cleveland
has taken
a big hit,
but we're
fighting back
on the banks of
the winding Cuyahoga
that empties into the broad-
(sheet) chested Lake Erie and
it's eerie the way that the weight
of it all doesn't seem too bad
when you actually have hope
and expect to do great things
even if they are small and un-
noticed by most of the pop-
ulation with over elation ...

this nation,
my nation,
Believeland
the new flag
to fly proudly

Cleveland is
a cold city with
no love they say.

I'm not sure I believe
them all the way.

The emptiness in my
life was suddenly made
more real, but i can
weather this storm
i can clutch to the
top rail of the back
of the ship until it
dips into the icy
waters and if
needed, i guess
i can hang to the
side selflessly
slowly freezing
for a little while
longer. the people
of Cleveland are
talking to me and
i have to answer ...
even if i don't have
all the answers. and
i don't. at all. but my
name is kpaul and
my intentions are
good and with a
tough new skin
and a slightly
smaller heart
i can perhaps
start to unravel
the mystery that
is Believeland for
myself not by myself,
but with friends far and
wide who want to see
positivity & honesty as well.

Today was hell,
but sometimes,
and i love this part -
sometimes the future
is better.