Pawing
Submitted by softserve on Thu, 03/11/2010 - 12:24am.
Cracking the coming dawn,
the sun, fractured like an egg,
oozes golden pus streaming a jagged horizon.
Shadows blaze the forest, rattling leaves;
bending the hanging rusted maples—no sparrows,
no silence here, oh, what became of silence?
People's tongues are strung to their yearning.
People are penetrated with holes.
People crawl out of their lives;’ constant pause
lots of incredible movement
lots of incredible movement (and unexpected development) in this poem. I like it - especially the crawling part. there's hope and, of course, a trepidatious pause.
I loved this one
there are many elements that I really loved. The last stanza is my favorite but barely as the middle is fantastic as well. Nearly a tie.
like an egg, oozes golden
like an egg,
oozes golden pus streaming a jagged horizon.
very nice visual ;)